Safe spaces
Sometimes you spend time in a particular place, with a particular group of people, and it changes you immeasurably.
This is the second time I’ve experienced that this year, the first was at Charleston.
Last week at Lumb Bank Arvon felt on the same level. It was a full rainbow of emotions, which is something I have been craving hard since crawling my way back up from the underworld of PND. After the time spent feeling nothing, being completely disconnected from the parts that allow feeling to happen sometimes; other times feeling nothing other than fear & self loathing, to be reminded that there are so many other ways to feel (and that each is fully valid) is an absolute joy.
Being by someone’s side as they share their truth, as they try, through words, to show the universal through the individual; as they show up to themselves and the work and the world, does something huge to my heart.
And something I have grown to understand through this experience at Arvon is the importance of safe space for creative non fiction writers and tutors alike. I talk lots about the role of care in the writing world, and when I worked with DLR Dun Laoghaire I felt so fully the link between emergency and care. Every step of the way the organisers made sure the needs of those speaking about climate and other forms of emergency were held with utmost tenderness. It meant that was one of the best experiences I’ve ever had in my work. Charleston Festival of The Garden seemed to also hold tenderness for the people involved close to its heart.
At Arvon last week we all shared how much we felt so held, so really and truly safe, and it showed in so many ways. I remember reading somewhere on an Instagram doula page that we sleep where we feel safe (and sometimes I guess even where we don’t feel safe, something I learned through having an extremely low sleep needs child) and I feel like the words might be the same for same people.
They come when we feel safe.
And I wonder what SAFE looks like to you?
What it feels like?
What does it take for you to show up to your words in a way that feels true, authentic, strong?
At this moment of such harrowing, heartbreaking lack of safety for so many, what can we do (or not do) to and for those around us— even those we may have only just met and may never even see again— to try to make them feel safe?
Safe in our company, in the relationship we build, in the world and the words?
I’m so grateful to the wonderful, hilarious Jarred McGinnis for a beautiful week tutoring together and the incredible and deeply inspiring Hannah Chukwu for sharing so generously as guest tutor. And to all the utterly amazing students, who filled me up with all the emotions. What a joy. I am so grateful I got to have this time.
How lucky we are.
I’ll lead my course MARK-MAKING CARE-TAKING with Verbal Arts Derry Mon 22nd January-Monday 26th Feb, 18.30-20.30 pm GMT via Zoom. This is open to writers at any stage of their journey. To register click here.
Sending light to all who are in darkness. X